


Emotions Had No Mercy

by wolfzaa



Series: Ignorantia Juris Non Excusat [2]
Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Communication Failure, Fluff and Angst, Harvey's trying his best here, I don't know how I managed that though, M/M, Misunderstandings, Past Harvey/Scottie, Pining, Season 3, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Still Oblivious!Mike, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-16
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-08-31 10:09:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8574211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfzaa/pseuds/wolfzaa
Summary: (Sequel to a Soulmate AU "Ignorantia Juris Non Excusat")After they bonded, Harvey still didn’t have a plan on talking in the near future.  They had all the paperwork to prove their soulmate bond anyway, it was officially said in the paper what he felt about Mike.  He didn’t have to say it himself.  What could possibly go wrong?He must have forgotten that emotions had no mercy at all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Here come the sequel! I suggest you to read [Ignorantia Juris Non Excusat](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8507548) for the background and settings before you start this one. ;)
> 
> (Canon divergence will start at Season 3 Episode 10, where Mike didn't move in with Rachel, and Harvey didn't start a proper relationship with Scottie.)

 

Gordon Specter was a romantic when it came to soulmates.  He believed in love at first sight and a lifetime soulmate bond where the couple would love each other until death did their part, which were separate cases, actually, but both were still romantic enough.

Harvey was not.

 

 

 

Being romantic was dangerous, because emotions had no mercy.

Despite every shit he tried to convince others, Harvey still had emotions.  Of course he had _feelings,_  he was only human thank you very much.  He couldn’t stop them eventually.  All he could do was keeping them inside where no one could find it, because, well, emotions were nothing but cruel shit.

Harvey learnt it the hard way.

Emotions were ruthless.  They would turn on you when you had nowhere to run.  They would trap you up and kill you from the inside.  They would drag you down and never let you go.  They didn’t care if you were unprepared or too weak to handle them at that time.  They absolutely didn’t care if there was something else going on when they attacked you, wrecked you, and brought you to the ground.

They had no mercy.

Harvey was only their victim.

 

 

 

Dealing with emotions wasn’t one of his strengths.

He told Donna, “Come work for me,” and she came into his life.  Time flew.  They got over whatever they once had and strengthened their bond -- not a soulmate-bond -- but one kind of a bond that couldn’t be broken easily; a something-else-bond, a lot-more-than-ordinary-bond, a _whatever-_ bond he didn’t care to name it properly.  She ran his life, he needed her, but they appreciated the space between more.  They were perfect that way.

Scottie was not the same.

Harvey knew how to flirt, but he didn’t knew how to do relationships.  Scottie understood that well so she never made a move, or at least, not until she made him _beg_ at the airport.

The wall between them had been destroyed since.

Dana Scott was a pure temptation.  Still, she gave him no chance to protect himself in any cases he might be lost.  He might be a shark, but even sharks themselves needed place to go back to.  Wolves needed their packs.  Lions needed their dens.  Predators might seek for a challenge, but they needed _home_.  Somewhere safe.  Someone _there._  And from where he stood, Scottie wasn’t there at all.

“I know that you care about me.  You have made that very clear,” she explained when he asked her the same thing he had asked Donna, or better, to come working _with_ him.  He even told her he _cared_.  Yet, it was pointless since she added, “But I am not interested in working with someone day-in and day-out where all they can manage to say is _I care about you_.”

Her feet was always right on the doorstep, ready to go.

“Is that all I’ve ever said?” Harvey frowned.  He was sure he did say _more_ than that.  She even had pushed him to say things that went beyond his territory before.  It surely was _more_ than just that.

“Actually, yes,” she shot back without blinking. “Over and over again. _I care about you._  Just what every girl wants to hear.”

“Scottie---”

“No, no, no,” She interrupted darkly.  “If all you want to do is work with me, I can find a job somewhere else.”

“It’s the best I---”

Harvey stifled a groan.  When he went after Zoe, he went without words, only cues.  He felt more of himself that way.  A cue.  A hint.  No unnecessary talk to tie him up.  No words to come back and cut into his skin like a sharp rope.  Rejection made his ground tremble the way he’d never admitted like an earthquake, but he could live with it.  He could move on like that.

Not this time.

“Scottie, that’s not all I want.” Harvey was desperate now.  The woman faltered her move as he tried to stop her, turning back and look up at him with her dark, daring eyes.

“Then say it.”

She was demanding.  Challenging.  Intriguing.  Scottie didn’t leave him an option to retreat or find his ground and settle.  All she did was stepping away from his shelter, daring him to follow -- to fight for her.

He had no other choice.

_“...I want you in my life.”_

Every word forced from his mouth left a crack in his soul.  It was dangerous.  It wasn’t safe.  It wasn’t _home_.  Though, he couldn’t get it back once it slipped out.  Scottie was stunned for a moment before her features softened.  Then, after a long minute of silence, she closed her eyes, waiting for him to lean in until their lips brushed.

Just when Harvey thought he had done it right this time, a cold shiver suddenly ran through his body like a blizzard.

They both winced.

Scottie jolted back.  Harvey’s heart sank.  A sharp frigid ripple spreading all over his back, sending straight right from his mark, felt incredibly familiar.  It had happened before.

It was the exact same thing that ran down their spines when they reunited before the merger.

Their heart valves snapped fast, echoing the sound inside their heads.  Their pulses trembled.  Their breath shuddered.  Their hope faded.  Harvey exhaled knowingly as he saw insecurity flashed under Scottie’s eyelashes.  He knew what she was thinking right now; how could she give away all her trust to him when her instinct didn’t comply?

His inner voice was screaming it, too.

Scottie was a smart woman.  She must have sensed what lied beneath Harvey’s choice of words since the last time they discussed -- when he told her she always meant something to him.  He didn’t lie, though.  She really had meant something to him.  Just something.  A something.  A maybe.  Just a hold on a broken rope and nothing more.  Her instinct must have sensed where it would lead to for a long time.

Her mark just proved it now.

“I wanted you, Harvey,” Scottie whispered grimly, pain and distress hanged firm in her voice.  “I know you did too.”

Harvey sighed, wondering when their best moments together had gone.  Maybe what happened in Harvard should have stayed in Harvard.  Not here.  Not now.

Not for them anymore.

“Yes,” Harvey answered quietly, tilting his head to give her a soft quick peck on her lips, almost an apology, “I did.”

She kissed back a goodbye.  His mark was still freezing cold.

At least they had tried.

 

 

 

He moved on, eventually.

The sting didn’t last as long as he secretly feared.  Harvey went back to work and worked harder, which helped a lot.  Life went on.  He offered her a job because she really did mean something to him so he had to do _something_ , and working with Scottie was easier than dating her anyhow.  They had been through whatever relationships on-and-off for long enough to let it go -- for good this time.

They were perfect that way.

No strings attached sex was still tempting, though the memory of their last encounter was stronger.  He was done with complicated relationships and nothing could ever change his mind.

Then, out of nowhere, Michael Goddamn Ross decided to move his way into Harvey’s life like a storm, bringing one particular mark with him.

_Holy fucking hell._

 

 

 

Harvey didn’t have to try when it came to Mike.  He didn’t even have a time to _think_.

It should be just an ordinary day at work, with some shitty add-on cases and stupid little problems his associate had caused, like a spilled Red Bull on their shirts, for example, and Harvey could deal with it as smoothly as ever.  He wasn’t the best fucking closer in New York for nothing.  He could deal with any bullshit that came across his life.

Anything but _this_.

Harvey knew right from the start where the line between him and Mike was so he never had considered crossing it.  He told himself he had no rights to think about Mike that way.  Mike was his associate.  His subordinate.  His team.  And, maybe, if he dared to call, his _friend_.  He was everything Harvey would take a risk on but not taking advantage of, so he let it slide.

Harvey had suppressed his desire in Mike for way too long.  He didn’t know how to start it now.

His mark suggested otherwise.

The sudden realization of their soulmate-bond was a dive through everything involved the kid; every touch Harvey had missed, every moment he had forgotten, every feeling he chose to ignore -- _everything._  The bond just kicked Harvey out of his plane at 30,000 feet above sea level with no parachute, leaving him in a sheer panic.

Emotions hit his body like a strong wind, cutting through every part it grasped.  His blood went cold.  His sight was a blur and his ears deafened.  He totally forgot how to breath.  It was too overwhelming.  It was too intense.

It was _terrifying_.

Harvey couldn’t think properly as he reached out desperately for _anything_ to stop this free-falling.  He was a drowning man clutching at the straw.  He was going to hit the ground if he couldn’t find anything to hold on to---

_“Harvey…”_

Then someone called out.  Harvey wasted no time to leap in as if his life depended on it and found Mike’s lips with his own.  Suddenly he found a safety net he had never realized it was there after all these times.  Harvey deepened the kiss instinctively.  There he found it… Those lips.  That voice.  A safe place.  Somewhere he could live.  Something he could not let go.  Someone he could trust his life with.

_Someone he had already risked everything for..._

Thrills immediately flushed through his nerves.  He didn’t know kissing Mike would be this fascinating, amazing, _intoxicating_.  If he knew, he would have done this since the first time he felt the urge to shove Mike onto his bed and let his instinct lead.  He would have follow that little voice inside his head and pull Mike close, just to look at him in the eye.  To see the bluest shade of the blue he ever saw.  To hear his voice whispering in his own ears.  To listen to his breathing sound and heartbeat.  To examine every flaw on the other’s skin underneath layers of fabric.  To do _everything_ he had never wanted this much in his life.

Gushing desire was terrifying.  Although Harvey wasn’t ready for this, he couldn’t stop himself for drowning into Mike just like that.

He didn’t want to talk right then, so he just didn’t.

 

 

 

The next day, Harvey woke up with someone wrapped in his arms.

He breathed in and scented something sweet and cozy that reminded him of a warm, clean sheet and new books.  There also was a faint hint of citrus hanging in the air under his nose.  Waking up never had been this content before, so Harvey simply allowed himself to stay like that a little bit longer.

Something soft placed against his skin gently pulled Harvey’s half-asleep mind back to full reality.  The touch started dragging along his neck, kissing languidly.  Though it felt good, extremely good Harvey would never admit it out loud, he was too curious to stay still.

When his eyes fluttered open, he saw blue.

“Shit,” the voice stumbled next to his ear before backing away. “I--- I didn’t mean to wake you up.  I’m sorry, Harvey.  I thought---”

There was Mike in the bed next to him with disheveled hair, big blue eyes, a very familiar grey t-shirt, and he was crawling backwards until he reached the far side of the blanket.  Harvey frowned while trying to recollect the memory of what happened last night.  That must be his oversized t-shirt from Harvard days, and, somehow, seeing Mike wearing it felt so _right_.

Oh, right.

He took a brief look at his associate-turned-friend-turned-soulmate’s flushed face, “Did you just kiss me?”

“No---  Uh, yes?  Maybe?  Kind of?” Mike looked somehow scared like a five-year-old getting caught stealing cookies as he began to ramble, “I don’t--- I mean--- I’m… I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself, I just--- Whoa!”

Mike yelped, didn’t expect Harvey to stretch his arms out and tug him back close with a mouth purposefully pressed against the crook of his neck.  The younger man lied stock-still on his back for a second before his half-dazed brain caught a sense of hot pressure trailing along his mark, drawing a soft gasp out of him effortlessly.

“Okay,” Mike muttered with a content moan. “This is--- This is good.  Okay.”

Harvey stifled a chuckle.  He was fully awake now and his memory flooded back the moment he saw those letters on Mike’s faint-freckled skin.  Soulmate still wasn’t Harvey’s area, just like love, but his panic at first had faded away in a good-long sleep.  Things would be different from now on.

Harvey sighed into his neck, secretly thanking God it was Mike whom he had imprinted on.  If the bond would last for a lifetime, he couldn’t picture anybody better.  He wouldn’t replace Mike with anyone else.

He just won’t.

Harvey continued nibbling on tensed muscles underneath his lips until the associate gradually relaxed and melted into his touch completely.  Harvey needed that.  In spite of how terrifying the situation should be, seeing Mike fidgeted nervously beside him in the line at the Local Imprinting Center yesterday, later on when they came back to Harvey’s room and then just a few moments ago, had calmed Harvey down a lot.  It meant none of them was ready to be bonded; Harvey sucked at relationships, and from what he saw, Mike was scared shitless about it too.  No one had the upper-hand here.  If that was the case, Harvey thought he can work something out one way or another.

“Okay, up.” Harvey finally pressed the last kiss on Mike’s left shoulder, unwrapping hands tangled around his own nape. “Breakfast time.”

Mike blinked. “You cook?”

“I live alone, rookie.  If you know any other way to produce appropriate meals for a living, enlighten me.”

“Well, I don’t know.  Hire your own chef?”

“Why waste money when I can open my own cereal box?” Harvey snorted. “C’mon, hotshot.  I’ll make you bacon and some eggs if you behave.  Go get a shower.”

 

 

 

“What happened?”

That was what Donna asked the first thing that morning as Harvey strolled his way into the office.  The senior partner halted his feet at the door, mockingly arching his eyebrow at the redhead.

“Why do you ask?”

“Your tie is a little loose, I don’t see any tension in your shoulders for the first time in these past months, and you missed a spot here.” Donna tapped her finger on her right jaw.  Suddenly, her eyes widened theatrically as she announced, “Ooh.  You got laid.  A _good_ one.  You went home early yesterday and you stopped by the LIC.  Was it Marisa?  No, no, no.  One time thing couldn’t do such effects.” She quirked an eyebrow. “Scottie?”

Harvey stared at her.  Donna stared back.

“Okay.  Not Dana,” She concluded with suspicious narrowed eyes. “Wait, I know what that smirk means, mister.  Are you playing games with me?”

“I don’t.” Harvey let out a half-annoyed, half-amused snort. “You do.”

“Harvey, when you said you wanted me to find--- Oh, hey Donna.” Mike strode in just before the secretary had a chance to respond.  His blue eyes fluttered a few times when he caught Donna’s flashed dangerously. “Um… I’m gonna come back later---”

“No.  Go on,” Harvey cut in. “You found something already?”

“Not yet.  I just wanted to make sure about something and I need your signature for a… documentation,” his voice rose a pitch higher by the last word.  Mike cleared his throat. “So, about the Kale Group… Did Jessica explicitly tell you to settle?”

“No, not explicitly,” Harvey confirmed. “It’s not important anyway.  We won’t settle.”

“I know we won’t.  Just need to know that she wants a settlement because I’ll have to find an exit plan for that too.  Oh, and,” Mike paused, unintentionally avoided Donna’s eyes and fixed only on Harvey’s to find his ground. “The signature.  I’ll get the file done and put it on your desk by this afternoon.”

Mike quickly made his escape, trying to look busy.  Donna shot an incredulous glare at her boss, looking almost breathless.

“I don’t like to be wrong, but please tell me that I’m wrong.”

“What should I say?” Harvey shrugged as he walked into his office, not even trying to hide a smug in his remark. “You used to know everything before it actually happens, why consider breaking the record now?”

“You slept with _Mike_?”

Harvey didn’t even have to answer that.

 

 

 

Also, Harvey still didn’t have a plan on talking with Mike in the near future.  They had all the paperwork to prove their soulmate bond anyway.

It was officially said in the paper what he felt about Mike.  He didn’t have to say it himself.  What could possibly go wrong?

 

 

 

He was totally wrong this time.

 

 

 

Mike was anxious as hell now.

Harvey was still an arrogant arsehole.  He was still giving Mike hard times at work and they hadn’t moved in together yet, but an added toothbrush on the sink, a cheap citrus scented shampoo in the shower, and cans of Red Bull alongside with Mike’s favorite snack bars in Harvey’s refrigerator spoke volume.  Having Mike by his side wasn’t Harvey’s problem at all, he just didn’t want to have a talk about it.

Mike lost his last line of patience three weeks later.

“I know you hate it, but I’m gonna do it anyway,” Mike declared after their dinner night at Harvey’s.  It wasn’t anything fancy; just the two of them sitting side by side on the sofa with an empty pizza box on the table and a sound of Harvey’s jazz record filling the room.  Harvey drank his water as he raised his eyebrow in question.  Mike took a deep breath before continued, “We need ground rules.”

Harvey was not surprised, yet Mike’s objective was still unexpected he had to repeat it, “Ground rules?”

“Well, you know, ignorance of the law is no excuse.” Mike huffed out a nervous laugh, refusing to meet his soulmate’s deep brown eyes while waving his hands in the air pointlessly. “You’re stuck with me now.  At least I have to know _your_ law so I won’t do anything that will make you leave.”

Harvey was planning to scoff back when he, much to his surprise, detected something under Mike’s breath he wasn’t prepared for -- a _fright_.  A sheer fright.  And it was showing clearly on Mike’s face right now no matter how hard he tried to keep it in.  Harvey pushed the joke aside as he straightened his back, unbidden lines formed between eyebrows.  Did the kid really believe he could go anywhere after everything that happened between them?

Offended as he was, Harvey lifted the younger man’s chin up to align their gaze together.  He wanted to know what was happening inside that goddamn brain.

“Why are you saying I’m gonna leave?” his voice was dangerously low even to his own ears.

“I don’t know.  I just…” Mike shrugged his shoulders like it wasn’t a big deal, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. “Let’s say no one never leaves me before, okay?  I just have to prepare myself so I won’t lose you.”

“Are you aware of what we are right now?”

Mike gave him his best glare. “I sometimes really don’t know if you are being romantic or sarcastic.”

“Mike, I’m serious.”

“So do I.”

“And you still doubt it?”

“It’s a fact, not a doubt,” Mike replied defensively. “People may not leave you, but you know what?  They leave _me_.  They always leave me and I can’t…” he groaned, trying to find the right word. “I just… I can’t live thinking someday you’ll leave me because of something I did and I don’t even know what it would be.  I want to be with you, Harvey.  I know you hate it, but I fell for you long before I saw your mark, and whether you like it or not, this _is_ a relationship.  Your mark sent you to me.  You don’t even have to love me back or---”

“I don’t have to love you back?” Harvey raised his voice in disbelief. “You think I only let you in here because of that shitty bond?”

A grip on Mike’s chin tightened until he cringed.  They eyes met for a mere second before Mike stubbornly glanced away with an implied ‘Yes’, breaking the contact.

Broke Harvey’s heart along with it.

His chest burnt just to know what Mike had thought of him for the past three weeks.  Harvey knew they both were broken somewhere and they needed time to adjust, but he never thought this idea would get through Mike’s head.  Just how broken one had to be to actually _believe_ something like that -- after everything Harvey had done.

It burnt.  Badly.

“I’m sorry,” Mike mumbled quietly after a long moment of uncomfortable silence. “I just want you to speak the law.”

Harvey's heart bled severely at the plead.  The associate still shifted anxiously in his seat.  His nails sank deep into the leather couch.  His nonchalant mask came off.  His icy blue eyes trembled, looking at everywhere but Harvey’s.  And every broken gesture just stabbed deeper into his core, piercing through every inch of Harvey’s soul.

Harvey had no idea why he felt like that.  Mike didn’t even push anything beyond his limits like Scottie did.  Mike was begging him to stay, not the other way around.  Having someone at his mercy should be Harvey’s territory.  This was him having power to control things the way he wanted.  This was him being in charge.  He should feel safe, having all these options in his very hands.

Somehow, it just hurt.

Harvey gritted his teeth.  He didn’t like it, nor he could stand seeing Mike break down into pieces.

Not anymore.

“You know what?  I don’t give a shit about the mark,” Harvey said eventually. “You know how I work, Mike.  You already know my rules and you’re an expert in breaking them, so why bothered setting new ones?”

“What?” Now it was Mike’s turn to be offended. “I’ve never break your rules.  I did exactly what you told me to!”

“Really?  You need me to spell it out for you?” Harvey cocked his head, challenging. “You betrayed my trust more than once, Mike.  That’s my first and most important rule: _You’re with me, you will never betray me._   And look what you’ve done.  You chose _Louis_ when _I_ need you.  You went back to your Trevor friend when I told you _not_ to.  Then again, you went behind _my_ back when Jessica threatened you.   _You_ are the one who almost _left_ me!”

“Hey!” Mike snatched Harvey’s hand off him. “I’m sorry about that already, alright?  You don’t have to---!”

**“Then look where you are!”**

Words hanged in the air.  Mike gaped, unable to finish his own sentence but stared into Harvey’s eyes helplessly, didn’t know what to say next.  The senior partner calmed his breath with a long sigh.

“No one ever broke my rules and was allowed to stay, let alone getting a second chance.” Harvey toned his voice down into a whisper. “I told you it’s a two-way street -- and it’s not just trust I’m talking about here.  I won’t say it again, so think about it carefully and answer my question: _Would I ever leave you if you didn’t have that mark?_ ”

Everything fell into silence when their eyes fixed together.  Anger had utterly faded away, leaving a trace of confusion, disbelief, shame, and guilt behind.  Fright was still there but pale enough to let a small piece of hope shine along within those light-blue irises.

Mike gave him a wry smile. “Why didn’t you leave then?”

“You didn’t let go.”

The blonde cracked out a laugh that sounded very much like a choke.  He sounded broken, still broken, but Harvey decided to let it go this time.

“No, I didn’t,” Mike muttered, leaning in until their forehead pressed together. “Will you?”

Harvey kissed him instead.

Mike complied almost desperately.  Harvey sighed into the kiss as he pushed the other man onto the couch, feeling the softness of those lips against his, memorizing every detail he could capture from every touch.  God, how could he be able to replace Mike with anyone else like this?  How could he be able to give up on him?  How could he be able to ever let go?

He couldn’t.

He can’t.

He _won’t._

Emotions still had no mercy on him and neither their bond.  Just one single brush of Mike’s lips and every feeling _burst_ , invading Harvey’s system with no holding back.  He kissed him harder and there he felt _everything_.  There he needed more.  There he was trapped inside a stream of desire and would never find a way back.

Mike fell apart under his touch, gasping.  Harvey tended to see more.  He tended to hear more.  He wanted to learn everything about him -- every scar -- every wound -- every bruised muscle -- every broken bone -- _everything._

He still didn’t say anything after that, but he made sure that Mike heard it properly this time.

 

 

 

They were perfect that way, after all.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

( “I love you,” Mike whispered into his ears that night, tracing his lips along the curve of the lobe, “And don’t you dare Han Solo me.”

Harvey shot him a death glare.

Mike just laughed hysterically. )

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Again, English is not my first language and this is non-beta. If you see any mistake, please feel free to correct them. :D


End file.
